You have bought a new mobile phone and in a few days of purchase, it has stopped working. You spoke to the company representative a week ago but it has still not been repaired. Write a letter to the company. In your letter: - introduce yourself - explain the situation - say what action you would like the company to take
Sample Response
Dear Sir or Madam, I purchased a brand new Samsung Smartphone from one of your stores. I was delighted to purchase it but frustrated to find that it stopped working after a few days of use. I am hoping you would replace it with a new one as I am entitled to a two-year replacement warranty. I purchased a Galaxy S24 Ultra mobile phone from your Madison Avenue store on 24th March. The phone worked fine for the first week, but then suddenly froze and stopped working. Since I have a valid replacement warranty, I immediately sent it to your store on Madison Avenue on 2nd April. The customer service representative promised me that the phone would be checked and a new phone would be dispatched to my home address soon. But to my dismay, when I spoke to this person two days ago, I was shocked to discover that the phone had not been checked yet! Because of this, I have been without a smartphone for which I have paid a good amount of money. As per the contract, I am entitled to get my cell phone replaced. Therefore, I expect you to ship me a brand new cell phone within a week. Otherwise, I would be forced to seek legal advice. Thank you in advance for your cooperation and actions. Yours faithfully, Muhammad Sameed
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use lowercase common noun Original: Smartphone Suggested revision: smartphone Why it matters: Smartphone is a common noun and does not need a capital letter here.
- 2. Format the date formally Original: 24th Suggested revision: 24 Why it matters: The cardinal-number date format is more conventional in a formal letter.
- 3. Use the precise verb Original: sent Suggested revision: returned Why it matters: Returned states the action more precisely in a complaint about faulty goods.
- 4. Clarify the reference Original: this person Suggested revision: the representative Why it matters: Naming the representative makes the reference clearer and more formal.
- 5. Use restrained punctuation Original: yet! Suggested revision: yet. Why it matters: A full stop maintains an appropriately controlled tone in this formal complaint.
- 6. Use formal cost wording Original: good Suggested revision: substantial Why it matters: Substantial is more precise and formal than good for describing cost.
- 7. Use the future form Original: would Suggested revision: will Why it matters: Will expresses the stated future consequence of the company failing to act.
- 8. Use a natural collocation Original: cooperation and actions Suggested revision: cooperation and prompt action Why it matters: Prompt action is the natural phrase for the response being requested.
- 9. Sentence rewrite Original: I am hoping you would replace it with a new one as I am entitled to a two-year replacement warranty. Suggested revision: I hope you will replace it with a new one, as I am covered by a two-year replacement warranty. Why it matters: The rewrite corrects the request form and uses a natural expression for warranty coverage.
- 10. Separate the letter stages Suggested revision: Use separate paragraphs for the complaint summary, the sequence of events, and the requested resolution. Why it matters: The single block combines several communicative stages that would be easier to follow as distinct paragraphs.
Suggested Rewrites
- Smartphone smartphone
- 24th 24
- sent returned
- this person the representative
- yet! yet.
- good substantial
Why this response received Band 7.5
The letter gives a detailed, convincing chronology of the purchase, failure, return, warranty promise, and continuing delay, then states a clear replacement deadline and consequence. Its strongest feature is the specific evidence supporting the complaint, while the main limitation is dense single-paragraph presentation and a slight mismatch with the prompt's one-week contact timeline. The priority is to clarify that chronology and separate the complaint into focused formal paragraphs.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The customer context, fault, unresolved service history, warranty basis, and requested replacement are fully developed in a suitably firm tone.
Align the account explicitly with the prompt by stating that the first conversation with the representative occurred one week ago and no repair followed.
Coherence and Cohesion
The complaint progresses logically from purchase to failure, return, follow-up, and requested action, but all content appears in one long paragraph.
Use separate paragraphs for purchase details, the fault and service history, the impact of the delay, and the requested resolution.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is flexible and precise for the product, warranty, service failure, and formal escalation, with only a few awkward collocations.
Replace phrases such as 'paid a good amount of money' and 'cooperation and actions' with 'paid a substantial amount' and 'prompt action'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of sentence structures is used accurately, and the few tense or modal issues do not affect clarity.
Use consistent formal modals in phrases such as 'I hope you will replace it' and refine the relative clause describing the phone's cost.
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You have bought a new mobile phone and in a few days of purchase, it has stopped working. You spoke to the company representative a week ago but it has still not been repaired. Write a letter to the company. In your letter:
- introduce yourself
- explain the situation
- say what action you would like the company to take
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.