As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual wellbeing. What factors contribute to job satisfaction? How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?
Sample Response
In current society, people’s dignity is shown by their education and job. Most of the people turn to work in the office environment because nowadays farms and agricultural products have less value. People spend most of the time in the office so job satisfaction is an essential part of someone's wellbeing However, I believe that satisfaction at work is everyone’s dream.
Firstly, there are many factors that influence job enjoyment. A good working environment that includes job security and better salary is the main and most important thing which helps each employee to be happy. Then comfortable seating and adequate lighting are other factors. For instance, if a person works in an information technology department, his work needs comfortable seating and lighting arrangement. Next is about timing as people like to work for fixed hours like seven to eight hours.
But according to women they wish to work less than that because they have household works and need to take care of their children. "Leaves" and "days off" are other contributing factors to provide job happiness. For example, employees who work as shift duties they have to work on public holidays, so it leads to unhappiness for them. Some workers wish to have the food and accommodation facilities near to the office because it’s really difficult to reach the office due to traffic in the peak time.
When we think about the reality of job satisfaction, it should come from ourselves. Most of the people have to make their job environment-friendly and balanced. First of all, when we get a job offer letter, we have to think about the satisfaction that we might get from that job. Most of the people are looking for a better salary only. In such cases, they may need to sacrifice some factors, like working at night time and doing on-call duties. If an employee has any difficulties in working environment, he can raise the concern to the human resource department, because in all companies they have employee satisfaction department for their employees.
To conclude, I believe that job pleasure and satisfaction is important in workplaces because if there is a good working environment and employees are happy, their productivity and enthusiasm to work will be better. Even though there are many things which make workers happy, it should be contributed by ourselves.
[ Essay by - Lettisha James ]
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use natural time phrase Original: current Suggested revision: contemporary Why it matters: ‘Contemporary society’ is the established formal expression.
- 2. Clarify the social claim Original: people’s dignity is shown by their education and job Suggested revision: people's status is often reflected in their education and employment Why it matters: ‘Status’ can be reflected by education and work, whereas ‘dignity’ is not normally shown by them.
- 3. Remove unnecessary words Original: Most of the people turn to work Suggested revision: Most people work Why it matters: ‘Most people’ needs no article, and the direct verb is sufficient.
- 4. Use concise location Original: in the office environment Suggested revision: in offices Why it matters: The plural location states the general workplace more directly.
- 5. Clarify the comparison Original: farms and agricultural products have less value Suggested revision: agricultural work is less valued Why it matters: The revision makes clear that the claim concerns employment rather than the intrinsic value of farms or products.
- 6. Use task terminology Original: enjoyment Suggested revision: satisfaction Why it matters: ‘Job satisfaction’ is the precise term used throughout the task.
- 7. Use comparative salary term Original: job security and better salary Suggested revision: job security and a higher salary Why it matters: Salaries are described as ‘higher’, and the singular count noun requires an article.
- 8. Remove redundant superlatives Original: the main and most important thing Suggested revision: the primary factor Why it matters: ‘Main’ and ‘most important’ repeat the same meaning.
- 9. Use additive transition Original: Then comfortable seating Suggested revision: Comfortable seating Why it matters: ‘Then’ suggests a sequence rather than another item in a list of factors.
- 10. Make the worker subject Original: his work needs comfortable seating Suggested revision: he needs comfortable seating Why it matters: A person, not their work, needs suitable seating.
- 11. Name the factor directly Original: Next is about timing Suggested revision: Another factor is working hours Why it matters: The revision replaces vague wording with the specific workplace condition.
- 12. Use uncountable leave Original: "Leaves" and "days off" Suggested revision: Leave and days off Why it matters: ‘Leave’ is uncountable in this employment context and does not need quotation marks.
Suggested Rewrites
- current contemporary
- people’s dignity is shown by their education and job people's status is often reflected in their education and employment
- Most of the people turn to work Most people work
- in the office environment in offices
- farms and agricultural products have less value agricultural work is less valued
- enjoyment satisfaction
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response identifies a useful range of workplace factors, and its practical examples about hours, leave, commuting, and working conditions are its clearest strength. However, the question of whether satisfaction is realistic for all workers is answered only indirectly, while frequent grammatical and collocational problems reduce precision. Prioritise a direct, reasoned judgement on universal job satisfaction, supported by contrasting workers and realistic constraints.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Several relevant satisfaction factors are explained, but the feasibility of satisfaction for all workers is not directly or fully evaluated.
State clearly how realistic universal job satisfaction is and support that judgement with contrasting worker circumstances.
Coherence and Cohesion
Paragraphs follow the task's broad parts, but progression is sometimes mechanical and several ideas are loosely connected.
Give each paragraph one controlling idea and use explicit cause-and-effect links instead of listing successive factors.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is adequate for the topic, although frequent awkward collocations and imprecise choices limit flexibility.
Replace phrases such as 'household works', 'work as shift duties', and 'provide job happiness' with natural workplace language.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mixture of sentence forms conveys the main message, but frequent errors in agreement, articles, clauses, and punctuation reduce accuracy.
Practise complete clause patterns and subject-verb agreement, then proofread each sentence for missing punctuation and articles.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual wellbeing. What factors contribute to job satisfaction? How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.