As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual wellbeing. What factors contribute to job satisfaction? How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?
Sample Response
Human life is divided into three phases. Out of which an adult phase is the most energetic and enthusiastic one. In this phase, the majority of the time is spent at work so the job satisfaction is very important. Although the factors related to it varies from person to person. Learning is a constant process in a person's life. Though the job looks monotonous after some time, learning never stops. This could be one of the reasons that a person can never say that he knows everything related to his work field. For example, Mr Bill gates cannot say that he knows everything about computers. A challenging and responsible work would increase the desire for learning. This is certainly the most important factor in job satisfaction. For instance, Pranav Mistry mentioned in one of his interviews regarding the successful presentation of 3G, that he started the project because he felt it was an extremely challenging and socially responsible assignment. Another important factor could be setting up the goals. A goal is the first step towards the destination. Thru focused attitude, even the toughest goals could be achieved. For example, I did not know excel macro while I was in college. However, now I am working on that in my job. This could happen just because I had a goal to learn it after college. One more important factor could be appreciation. Most of the employee expects a confirmation that their hard work is being noticed. For instance, an award or a certificate could boost the confidence and it could motivate the employee to work on the next goal. I believe job satisfaction should be very important for everyone because a job is not a short-term mission. It is very difficult to continue uninteresting work for a longer period.
[ Essay by - Naaz]
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Remove article Original: the job satisfaction Suggested revision: job satisfaction Why it matters: Job satisfaction is an uncountable general concept and does not take the.
- 2. Subject agreement Original: varies Suggested revision: vary Why it matters: The plural subject factors requires vary.
- 3. Use natural phrasing Original: looks Suggested revision: becomes Why it matters: Becomes monotonous more naturally describes a change over time.
- 4. Use natural collocation Original: his work field Suggested revision: their field of work Why it matters: Field of work is the standard phrase and their avoids unnecessary gendering.
- 5. Capitalise name Original: Mr Bill gates Suggested revision: Bill Gates Why it matters: The surname requires a capital letter and the title is unnecessary with the full name.
- 6. Uncountable work Original: A challenging and responsible work Suggested revision: Challenging and responsible work Why it matters: Work is uncountable in this general sense and does not take a.
- 7. Refine verb pattern Original: increase the desire for learning Suggested revision: increase the desire to learn Why it matters: Desire to learn is the more natural infinitive pattern.
- 8. Awkward reporting phrase Original: mentioned in one of his interviews regarding Suggested revision: said in an interview about Why it matters: The revision uses a concise and grammatical reporting construction.
- 9. Wrong goal collocation Original: setting up the goals Suggested revision: setting goals Why it matters: Set goals is the standard collocation.
- 10. Use general article Original: the Suggested revision: a Why it matters: The sentence introduces a destination generally rather than a previously identified one.
- 11. Use formal phrasing Original: Thru focused attitude Suggested revision: With a focused approach Why it matters: Thru is informal and approach is the natural noun here.
- 12. Capitalise and pluralise Original: excel macro Suggested revision: Excel macros Why it matters: Excel is a proper name and macros should be plural in this general reference.
Suggested Rewrites
- the job satisfaction job satisfaction
- varies vary
- looks becomes
- his work field their field of work
- Mr Bill gates Bill Gates
- A challenging and responsible work Challenging and responsible work
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response's strongest feature is its range of relevant factors—continuous learning, challenging work, goal-setting and recognition—each supported by some explanation or example. Its central limitation is that it scarcely answers how realistic universal job satisfaction is, replacing that evaluation with a statement about its importance. Prioritise a separate, developed discussion of why satisfaction cannot be guaranteed for every worker, supported by workplace constraints and a clear conclusion.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Several contributors to job satisfaction are explained, but the response largely omits the required evaluation of whether satisfaction is realistic for all workers.
Devote a full paragraph to the second question, considering differences in pay, working conditions, autonomy or available employment before reaching a direct judgement.
Coherence and Cohesion
The factors follow a recognisable sequence and examples are signposted, but mechanical linking, fragments and the absence of paragraph breaks weaken progression.
Use separate paragraphs for the main satisfaction factors and the realism question, with each paragraph built around one controlling idea.
Lexical Resource
The response has enough vocabulary to discuss learning, challenge, goals and recognition, although word choice, spelling and collocation errors recur.
Use standard phrases such as 'field of work', 'set goals', 'a focused approach' and 'employees expect recognition', and avoid informal spelling such as 'Thru'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Both simple and complex structures are attempted, but frequent fragments, agreement errors and article problems reduce control while meaning remains generally clear.
Turn dependent fragments beginning with 'Although' or 'Out of which' into complete sentences and check subject–verb agreement in plural noun phrases.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual wellbeing. What factors contribute to job satisfaction? How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.