The charts below show the number of Japanese tourists travelling abroad between 1985 and 1995 and Australia's share of the Japanese tourist market.
Sample Response
The charts present data on the number of Japanese holidaymakers who travelled overseas over 11 years, from 1985 to 1995, and the Australia's share of the Japanese tourist marketpercentage of Japanese tourist market for Australia. It is evident from the graphs that the number of Japanese travelling overseas increasedmore Japanese toured overseas during this period and the number of Japanese visitors to AustraliaAustralia visiting travellers soared. As the charts showAs the illustration suggests, from 5 million holidaymakers in 1985, the number of JapaneseJapan's travellers experienced substantial growthan exponential growth to approximatelysomewhere in the vicinity of 11 million in 1990 before decreasing slightly in 1991. Furthermore, the total rose againits rate soared again from almost 12 millionmillions in 1992 to approximately 15.5 millionjust over 14 millions in 1995. Moreover, from 2 percenta negligible 2 percent in 1985, the percentage of Japan's tourist market rose gradually to approximately 5 percentrose gradually approximately 5 percent before falling back to aroundsomewhere 4.5 percent in 1990. In addition, its percentage reached a peak more than 6 percent in 1994 and fell back to 6 percent in 1995. It is evident that more Japanese travelled to Australiatravelled Australia in later years thanthat they did in the earlier yearsin early years and the overall trend was upward despite some fluctuationsthe growth was steady.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The report’s strongest feature is its clear recognition that both Japanese outbound travel and Australia’s market share rose substantially overall. Its main limitation is visual accuracy, particularly the misdated fall and peak in Australia’s share and the understated 1995 tourist total; the highest-priority improvement is to verify every year against the correct chart before describing the sequence with precise trend language.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response provides a relevant overview and identifies the main upward trends, but several values and years are inaccurate, especially for Australia’s share and the 1995 total.
Report the market-share dip in 1989, the peak in 1993, and roughly 15.5 million outbound tourists in 1995.
Coherence and Cohesion
The information follows a generally logical sequence from outbound totals to Australia’s share, although the single paragraph and repetitive linking reduce clarity.
Use an overview paragraph followed by one detail paragraph for each chart, linking only genuinely related data points.
Lexical Resource
There is sufficient trend vocabulary, but expressions such as “Australia visiting travellers,” “exponential growth,” and repeated “somewhere” are imprecise.
Use measured phrases such as “Japanese visitors to Australia,” “rose steadily,” and “approximately.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Meaning is generally clear, but recurring errors with prepositions, plurals after numbers, articles, and comparative forms reduce control.
Write “12 million,” “travelled to Australia,” and “than they did” while checking each noun and preposition.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The charts below show the number of Japanese tourists travelling abroad between 1985 and 1995 and Australia's share of the Japanese tourist market.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.