In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of ageing populations.
Sample Response
In the modern world, life expectancythe expected life of an individual is gradually increasing. Many people think that the trend is a positive development, but it has caused some problems for many countries. The following essay will discuss the effects of this trendthe effect of this positive trend, and some of the ways that could be considered in addressing the problem. It is a fact that average life expectancy of a single person has increased these days, due to the global improvement in the economic development, social policy, education, and public healthsector of economic, social politic, education and public health. Despite this positive development, the ageing population has caused some issues for governments. Firstly, as the number of senior people increasesincrease, the budget that governments must provide for the pensionretirement fund and medical care automatically risesrise. Secondly, the growing number of senior people may create population-density problemswill be aligned with density problems. As the population of older people growsold people grow, the demand for housing risesdemand for the housing rise and consequently increase the price of properties, which would be a problem for the young people. However, there are some steps that governments could consider to resolve the issue. One of the ways is that governments could extend standard retirement ageretirement age standard. Many countries are having the standard pension age at the age of 55 years old, and they could raise the age to 60 or 65extend the age into 60 or 65 years since their senior people are still in a healthy and prime condition. Therefore it would reduce governments’ social welfare budget for the retired people. Besides that, governments could also provide a subsidy for the young people when they plan to buy a house. In conclusion, the world is developing rapidly in the last few years, and it has positively impacted on the average life expectancy. However, this positive trend has caused some problems for individuals and communities, ; therefore, it is necessarytherefore it is necessary for governments to take some actions in solving the issue.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response addresses both parts of the task with relevant discussion of pension and healthcare costs, retirement age, and housing support, and its progression is broadly logical. Its main limitation is presentation: the entire essay forms one long paragraph, while some effects and solution links remain underexplained and language errors reduce precision. The priority is to divide the response into clear sections and connect each proposed measure explicitly to a stated problem.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The essay addresses problems and measures with relevant points about pensions, healthcare, retirement age, and housing, though some effects need stronger explanation.
Match each measure directly to the problem it reduces and include both individual and social impacts.
Coherence and Cohesion
The order is logical, but the essay is written as one long paragraph, which weakens readability.
Use separate paragraphs for introduction, problems, solutions, and conclusion.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is suitable for ageing and policy, but some collocations and word forms are inaccurate.
Use phrases such as pension costs, healthcare spending, raise the retirement age, and housing affordability.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Grammar is generally understandable, but agreement, articles, and clause boundaries need editing.
Check agreement after number, population, and demand, and avoid comma splices.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of ageing populations.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.