Some people warn that the era of the silver screen is coming to an end and that people will eventually lose interest in going to the cinema. Do you agree or disagree with this view?
Sample Response
These days, the existence of cinemas is a hot topic of discussion among both journalists and the general publicfor not only the journalist but also common folk. Many daily's features and public debates topic have been focusing this issue. Though millions support the view thatsupport the opinion of the silver screen will exist in the futurewill exist in future, I strongly hold the view that the silver screen era will take its last breathwill be taken its last breath soon. One of the obvious reasons: advanced televisions and other electronic gadgets make it easy to watchfacilitate to watch all visual media programmesprogramme, including films, at homefrom the home settings. These facilities significantly reduce cinema attendancecut down the number of cinema customers significantly. Moreover, cinema tickets are often expensivecinemas mostly cost an arm and a leg for common folk. Televisions breach this barrier considerably. To cite an example, a recent study by a UK statistics departmentrecent UK statistical department study reveals that the ticket sale of the cinema has significantly declined on Sunday evening because of a popular television music show aired at the same timeshow aired the same time. Another reason to support my view is that live football, cricket and music concerts attractthe live football, cricket and music concert attract massive public attention. They give a complete visual treat, which can not be offered by many cinemas. Furthermore, these kinds of live activities offer several formsexplore several avenues of entertainment compared with cinemasthan cinemas. The increasing numberIncreasing the number of music and sports events is clear evidence ofthe best epitome for public acceptance. However, an army of people argues that cinema world will not be lost because new talented artists will comebecause of the new talented artists will come to the silver screen soon. Perhaps it may be true to some degree, but we can not deny that the other medium of entertainment will also offer high-quality performanceshigh quality of participants’ perfectionism. To crown it all, the other mode of entertainment will shut the popularity of cinema in the future, though some new talented actors and moviemakers will appear in the cinema world in future.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response states and sustains a clear position, using several relevant reasons such as home viewing, cinema costs, and competing entertainment. Its persuasiveness is reduced by loosely explained claims and frequent awkward or inaccurate phrasing, while the single-block presentation weakens the structure. The highest priority is to organise each main reason into a focused paragraph and explain the cause-and-effect link with precise, grammatically controlled language.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A consistent position is supported by several relevant reasons and a counterargument, although some claims are only loosely explained or convincing.
Clarify how each alternative directly reduces cinema attendance and support the reasoning with a plausible, fully explained example.
Coherence and Cohesion
The sequence from home viewing to other entertainment and a counterargument is discernible, but one-block presentation and heavy signposting limit cohesion.
Create focused body paragraphs and use referencing and logical connections within them instead of repeatedly announcing each new reason.
Lexical Resource
There is a broad attempt at topic-specific and less common vocabulary, but frequent collocation errors often make the expression awkward or imprecise.
Choose natural combinations such as cinema attendance, home viewing, and reduce cinema's popularity, avoiding idioms unless their use is secure.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of structures is attempted and the main meaning usually remains clear, but errors in agreement, articles, verb patterns, and clause formation are frequent.
Check every complex sentence for a complete main clause, correct verb pattern, and agreement before adding further detail.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people warn that the era of the silver screen is coming to an end and that people will eventually lose interest in going to the cinema. Do you agree or disagree with this view?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.