Some people think that it is important to use leisure time for activities that improve the mind, such as reading and doing word puzzles. Other people feel that it is important to rest the mind during leisure time. Which one do you agree with? Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Sample Response
Many people believe that it is important to useit is significant using spare time for activities that stimulate the mindthings that enhance the mind, for instance, reading and doing word puzzles. Others thinkThe others think that it is vital to relax the mind during spare time. In my opinion, I agree that people should use leisure time for activities which improve the mind.
On the one handIn one hand, some people have very exhausting jobs. Therefore, they would like to relax during leisure time, so they do not want to do anything within this time. They think they need to rest. Moreover, many people are lazy, for this reason, they aredo not keen to do activities to improve the mind. For instance, they may avoid reading books or doing sudoku puzzles.For instance reading a book and doing sudoku puzzles.
On the other hand, many people have stressful jobs too, but they like to enhance the mind. Therefore, they do many things during their leisure timewithin leisure time such as reading a novel, solving puzzles, doing exercises which are useful for improving the mind. I think that people who use their spare time to do activitiesutilise spare time doing activities that strengthen cognitive skillsboost the mind are more successful than others who love to use spare time for relaxing.
Finally, in my opinion, people should use their leisure time to improve the mind. For this reason, people should do anything which is useful for enhancing the mind. Moreover, Iı would argue that people should be hard working not to be idle. So they always do something to be more successful. Furthermore, I think some activities are so relaxing while they improve the mind. For example, doing sudoku puzzles can be relaxing and mentally useful.Such as doing sudoku puzzles.
In conclusion, ı agree that people should do activities that improve the mind during leisure time. because, while they are doingbecause, while that they are performing activities for improving the mind, the activities can contribute to job achievement. Moreover, I think, leisure time should be used effectively since it is so precious.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response clearly discusses both perspectives and maintains a consistent opinion in favour of mentally stimulating leisure activities. However, its support is repetitive and overgeneralised, while fragments, uneven progression, and frequent grammar errors weaken clarity. The highest priority is to develop each view with a specific, realistic explanation and example, expressed in complete sentences, before showing more convincingly why the preferred view is stronger.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The essay discusses both views and gives a clear opinion, but support is repetitive and some claims about laziness and success are too broad.
Develop each view with one realistic reason and one example, then explain why your own view is stronger.
Coherence and Cohesion
Paragraphing is present, but progression is uneven and fragments interrupt the flow.
Use clearer topic sentences and make every example a complete sentence.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is enough for the topic, but repeated use of mind, spare time, and activities limits range.
Use phrases such as mental stimulation, cognitive skills, recovery, and leisure activities.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Verb-pattern, article, capitalization, and fragment errors are frequent, though main meaning is usually clear.
Focus on gerunds after prepositions, complete sentences, and correct capital “I”.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think that it is important to use leisure time for activities that improve the mind, such as reading and doing word puzzles. Other people feel that it is important to rest the mind during leisure time. Which one do you agree with? Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.