Young people in the modern world seem to have more power and influence than any previous young generation. Why is this the case? What impact does this have on the relationship between old and young people?
Sample Response
Nowadays, modernisation defines how technology can be a powerful tool and this has changed the way young people used to perceive their position in a society. Young people areThe young group are far more motivated by the technological transformation, thus giving them more power than previous generationsthe power over the past young generations. This essay will discuss some reasons why this is happening in today's world and how this development impacts their relationship with older peoplewith the elder people. To begin with, youngsters are fit for the jobs that require technological competencesoundness. They tend to be curious about technological changesthe modern changes, therefore they are more likely to adapt to themit. Due to this adjustment process, they invest their time learning and applying to institutions that can provide opportunities for them. Furthermore, younger generations todaypresent young generations are enthusiastic, thus they are more aware of changesobservant with the changes on how this transformation helps societythis transformation help the society. SecondlySecond, they are physically fit for the job, since this change results in considerable stresstons of stressors. Numerous studies show that young people todaytoday's individuals can still be productive with only four to six hours of sleep. Since they spend more time researchinginvest more of their time with research and discovering new ideas, Deletethen they are more capable of handling bigger responsibilities compared to the previous young generations and the current older generationpresent older generation. Moreover, past youngsters were more focusedfocus on their families and their commitmentsthe commitment but this is not the case today. Youngsters are becoming entrepreneurs and using their knowledge to become successful. HoweverOn the contrary, this transformation may create a negative impact on the relationship between the older and younger generationsold and young group. For example, young people may create distant relationships with the old generation, since they know that they are ahead in terms of learning and adapting to change. To conclude, young people are now dominating the technological world and as a result, the old generation is now experiencing less importance. However, youngsters should always respect the elder people and maintain a steady relationship with them for a better society.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The essay identifies technology, adaptability, entrepreneurship, and changing priorities as reasons for young people’s influence, and it recognizes that these shifts can create distance from older generations. Its main limitation is uneven development: the relationship impact receives little analysis, several supporting claims are implausible or unclear, and the response lacks paragraphing. The priority is to develop both questions in separate paragraphs using realistic examples and explicit cause-and-effect reasoning.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both questions are addressed, but the reasons are uneven and the impact on intergenerational relationships is only briefly developed through a single negative effect.
Explain two credible causes of increased influence and analyse both a specific tension and a possible positive effect on relationships with older people.
Coherence and Cohesion
A recognizable sequence moves from causes to relationship effects and a conclusion, but the single-block format and loosely connected supporting claims weaken progression.
Use separate introduction, causes, relationship-impact, and conclusion paragraphs, each organized around one controlling idea.
Lexical Resource
The response attempts varied technology and employment vocabulary, but frequent awkward collocations and imprecise references reduce clarity.
Use natural phrases such as “technological competence,” “adapt quickly to change,” “spend time on research,” and “become distant from older people.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of structures is attempted, but recurring errors in agreement, articles, pronouns, prepositions, and clause formation frequently reduce accuracy.
Check agreement and referencing in every sentence, especially plural subjects such as young people, generations, changes, and responsibilities.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Young people in the modern world seem to have more power and influence than any previous young generation. Why is this the case? What impact does this have on the relationship between old and young people?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.