Some people believe that children should be allowed to stay at home and play until they are six or seven years old. Others believe that it is important for young children to go to school as soon as possible. What do you think are the advantages of attending school from a young age?
Sample Response
Children today are naturally activeChildren are born proactive in the present generation. Therefore,, hence every parent is quite enthusiastic to help their children develop more quicklymake their child grow faster. It is parents' responsibilitythe responsibility of the parents to send their children to school at the right age. It can be believed that sending children to school is preferable tomore comfortable rather than keeping them at home. In my opinion, a child definitely gains additional benefitsgains something more if he is sent to school at a very young age.
In many countriesGlobally speaking, nowadays we have innovative teaching methodsextraordinary school teachings such as technology-based instructionlike e-techno. If we consider this as an instance children gain much knowledge visually than the technical way of implementation. Even a child with an average IQ can understandcan also understand what is happening around him. Moreover, education is a part of life thatwhich never endsdoes not have an end. So, every parent considers sendingthinks to send their children at a particular age.
Some people think that children should stay with their parentsthe parent until they are at least six or seven years old because children feel pressuredforcible and uncomfortable at a very young age without them. HoweverBut, the education system is changing more rapidly, the way of thinking and behaviour of the parents has to change according to the system. Furthermore, completion of studies may make the student get into corporate companies and mould to the outside world at a very young age.
To summarise, I personally believe that children should be sent to school at a young age since, in today’s world, competition plays an important role. Everything goes on ‘First Come First Serve’ basis it also depends on the mental and physical ability of the children to send to school. Since not everyone is a child prodigy their capabilities are to be considered.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response maintains a generally supportive view of early schooling and offers some potentially relevant points about learning and adapting to the wider world. Its main limitation is that the advantages remain vague, weakly supported, or diverted into competition, parental attitudes, and future employment rather than young children's immediate development. The highest-priority improvement is to develop two clearly relevant benefits with concrete explanations and age-appropriate examples.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response supports early schooling but only partially develops relevant advantages, with several ideas becoming tangential or unclear.
Focus on two direct advantages, such as social development and foundational learning, and explain precisely how early attendance produces each benefit.
Coherence and Cohesion
Paragraphing and basic progression are evident, but some sentences and supporting points connect loosely and the conclusion introduces qualifications unclearly.
Give each body paragraph one explicit advantage and arrange its sentences in a clear claim, explanation, and example sequence.
Lexical Resource
The response attempts a reasonable range of vocabulary, but frequent inaccurate or unnatural expressions weaken precision and clarity.
Use conventional educational language and replace vague phrases such as e-techno, extraordinary school teachings, and mould to the outside world.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of sentence forms is attempted, but recurring errors in comparison, punctuation, articles, and clause structure sometimes strain readability.
Prioritize complete sentence boundaries and accurate comparative structures, then check articles and agreement throughout.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people believe that children should be allowed to stay at home and play until they are six or seven years old. Others believe that it is important for young children to go to school as soon as possible. What do you think are the advantages of attending school from a young age?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.