Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later, and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangers of committing a crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
It is true that ex-prisoners can become productive, law-abiding members of societynormal, productive members of society. I completely agree with the idea that allowing reformed ex-prisoners to speakallowing such people to speak to teenagers about their experiences is the best way to discourage them from breaking the law.
In my opinion, teenagers are more likely to accept advice from someone with direct personal experiencesomeone who can speak from experience. Reformed offenders can tell young people how they became involvedtell young people about how they became involved in crime, the dangers of a criminal lifestyle, and what life in prison is really like. They can also challenge any belief that teenagers may holddispel any ideas that teenagers may have about criminals leading glamorous lives. While adolescents are often indifferent to the guidance given by older people, I imagine that most of them would be particularlyextremely keen to hear the stories of an ex-offender. The vivid and perhaps shocking contentnature of these stories is likely to have a powerful impact.
The alternatives to inviting reformed criminals to speakThe alternatives to using reformed criminals to educate teenagers about crime would be much less effective. One option would be for police officers to visit schools and talk to young people. This could be useful for informing teenagersuseful in terms of informing teens about what happens to lawbreakers when they are caught, but young people are often reluctant to take advice from authority figuresfigures of authority. A second option would be for school teachers to speak to their students about crime, but I doubt that students would see teachers as credible sources on this topiccredible sources of information about this topic. Finally, educational films might be informative, but there would be no opportunity for young people to interact and ask questions.
In conclusion, I fully support the view that people who have turned their lives around after serving a prison sentence could help deter teenagerscould help to deter teenagers from committing crimes.
Why this response received Band 9.0
The response gives a direct, fully developed argument, using the distinctive credibility of reformed offenders and a focused comparison with alternatives to support its position. The main limitation is that the claim that they are the best speakers is accepted with little qualification about suitability or safeguarding. The highest-priority refinement is to acknowledge that condition briefly while preserving the clear line of argument.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response fully addresses the proposition, maintains an unequivocal position, and develops persuasive reasons through explanation and comparison.
Briefly qualify that suitable, genuinely reformed speakers should be selected to make the conclusion even more robust.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument is exceptionally easy to follow, with purposeful paragraphing and cohesive links that never feel mechanical.
Retain this clear progression while continuing to make each paragraph serve one distinct argumentative function.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is wide-ranging, precise, and natural, including effective distinctions among reformed offenders, authority figures, and credible sources.
Continue using this degree of precision while keeping register consistently formal, for example preferring teenagers to teens.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex grammatical structures are used flexibly and accurately, with consistently clear and controlled sentences.
Maintain this accuracy while varying sentence length occasionally to give key conclusions even greater emphasis.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later, and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangers of committing a crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.