The diagram shows the changes that have taken place at West Park Secondary School since its construction in 1950.
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Sample Response
The maps illustrate how West Park Secondary School has developed over the years since its initial construction in 1950. Overall, theOverall the school has undergone some noticeable changes, namely the addition of the sports field, the car park and the science block.
In 1950, a large portion of the space near the main road was occupied by houses with farmland situated to the south.along with a designated space for farmland. The school was builtbulit next to the houses with a playground directly to its south.with its own playground. In 1980, the houses werehouses were demolished and replaced by a car park and a science blocktransformed into a car park. The school area was divided into two parts: the main building and a science block. Directly south of the car park,Behind the car park, far from the main road, thea farmland was convertedhas been converted into the sports field.
After a major redesign,After major redesign, in 2010, the playground and the sports field were reduced in size and placed next to each other south of the main building and science blocksouth of the school's main building. Furthermore, a significant amount of space was allocated to the car park with Deletean entrance from the main road.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response effectively highlights the main developments of the school across the three time periods, providing a clear overview and logical chronological structure. The description is supported by accurate spatial reporting and appropriate map-related vocabulary, though minor language slips occur. To improve, ensure complete precision when describing where replacement facilities were built and double-check minor grammatical details.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The essay presents a clear overview of the key changes over time and covers the main structural developments across all three years.
Detail precisely how land was divided when replacing old features, such as clarifying that the residential area in 1950 became both the car park and science block in 1980.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information is arranged logically by year, creating a clear and progressive narrative across the three paragraphs.
Incorporate a wider range of cohesive devices to connect sentences smoothly within paragraphs rather than relying mostly on chronological openers.
Lexical Resource
A good range of topic-appropriate vocabulary related to urban development and map changes is used effectively.
Proofread carefully to eliminate minor spelling slips like bulit and maintain consistent precision in lexical choices.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Sentence structures show a good mix of simple and complex sentences, predominantly using accurate passive forms for describing changes.
Ensure consistent tense usage across historical time points, avoiding unexpected shifts to the present perfect when describing past changes.