People attend colleges or universities for many different reasons (for example, new experiences, career preparation, increased knowledge etc.). Why do you think people attend colleges or universities?
Sample Response
"From here, light and sacred draughts." – The motto of Cambridge University tells people that a university is a place where enlightenment and precious knowledge is awarded. Since the establishment of the first university, it has been a great honour to be accepted. Today, universities and colleges are much more accessible and therefore, more people prefer to receive a higher education. Several reasons are presented in this essay.
First of all, a large number of people study there for the purpose of a degree, which is beneficial, or even necessary for job application. With a higher degree, applicants are more likely to find a better position. However, with increasing number of students pouring in, the quality of education may be reduced, particularly for students with little eagerness for study.
Acquiring knowledge appears to be the main reason for most students. A university or college is believed to be an ideal place to learn meaningful or useful knowledge. Through libraries, knowledge and ideas of people all around the world can be shared. On the other hand, teaching standard is much superior to high schools. Thanks to these abundant resources, a student can dive into the ocean of knowledge freely.
Nonetheless, the real essence of a university is not knowledge itself, but the methodology of learning. When we scrutinise the synopsis of any programmes, those structures seem to be similar, which without any exceptions, direct to the ability to learn. Perhaps this is the reason why companies have a preference for a higher degree. Good ability of learning accompanies one with his whole life. Hence, studying in a university is undoubtedly a precious experience.
After the analysis above, it turns out that the reasons for receiving higher education are tightly bound to each other. An opportunity of secondary or tertiary education is advantageous in every aspect. Consequently, numerous people are attending universities and colleges.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Correct verb choice Original: awarded Suggested revision: imparted Why it matters: Knowledge is imparted or shared, whereas awarded is used for prizes, qualifications, or honours.
- 2. Complete the phrase Original: to be accepted Suggested revision: to be accepted into one Why it matters: Accepted needs a destination here to make clear that applicants enter a university.
- 3. Remove misplaced comma Original: therefore, Suggested revision: therefore Why it matters: The comma incorrectly separates therefore from the clause it modifies after the conjunction.
- 4. Remove unnecessary article Original: receive a higher education Suggested revision: receive higher education Why it matters: Higher education is normally uncountable when referring to university-level study in general.
- 5. Clarify reference Original: study there Suggested revision: attend university Why it matters: The replacement removes the vague reference there and states the activity directly.
- 6. Use natural phrase Original: for the purpose of a degree Suggested revision: to earn a degree Why it matters: People earn a degree rather than study for the purpose of one.
- 7. Use plural noun Original: application Suggested revision: applications Why it matters: The plural is needed because the statement refers to applications in general.
- 8. Add missing article Original: with increasing number Suggested revision: with an increasing number Why it matters: The singular countable phrase increasing number requires the article an.
- 9. Use academic verb Original: students pouring in Suggested revision: students enrolling Why it matters: Enrolling states the intended process more precisely and formally than pouring in.
- 10. Improve collocation Original: little eagerness for study Suggested revision: little motivation to study Why it matters: Motivation to study is the natural collocation for limited willingness to learn.
- 11. Remove redundant wording Original: meaningful or useful knowledge Suggested revision: useful knowledge Why it matters: Meaningful and useful overlap here, so one precise modifier is sufficient.
- 12. Correct relationship Original: ideas of people all around the world Suggested revision: ideas from people around the world Why it matters: From correctly identifies people as the source of the ideas.
Suggested Rewrites
- awarded imparted
- to be accepted to be accepted into one
- therefore, therefore
- receive a higher education receive higher education
- study there attend university
- for the purpose of a degree to earn a degree
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response offers a clear range of relevant reasons for higher education and organizes them into a logical progression from credentials to knowledge and learning skills. Its main limitation is recurring awkward grammar and collocation, which sometimes obscures otherwise thoughtful ideas, alongside brief digressions from the question. The highest-priority improvement is to express each reason in simpler, more idiomatic sentences and support it with a directly relevant example.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Several relevant reasons are presented and explained, though the point about declining educational quality and parts of the conclusion are only loosely connected to why people attend university.
Keep every paragraph focused on a distinct motivation and illustrate each one with a specific real-world consequence or example.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay follows a clear paragraph structure and generally progresses logically, but some transitions signal relationships that are not fully accurate.
Use connectors such as however, on the other hand, and nonetheless only where the following idea genuinely contrasts with the preceding one.
Lexical Resource
The response demonstrates a good range of academic vocabulary, but recurring unnatural collocations reduce precision and fluency.
Replace phrases such as eagerness for study and ability of learning with established combinations such as motivation to study and ability to learn.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A variety of complex structures is attempted successfully, but recurrent errors in articles, agreement, comparison, and clause construction remain noticeable.
Prioritize accurate noun phrases and relative clauses, checking articles, subject-verb agreement, and the grammatical subject of each complex sentence.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
People attend colleges or universities for many different reasons (for example, new experiences, career preparation, increased knowledge etc.). Why do you think people attend colleges or universities?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.