It is said that day-by-day people’s lives are becoming increasingly stressful. What are the reasons behind that? What can be done to solve this problem?
Sample Response
Today, human lifestyleshuman's lifestyle has become more complicated than ever before. A variety of factors have contributedA variety of factors has been implicated for this, however, I believe that traffic congestion and job competition are two leading reasons, and the government should consider two solutions to tackle them. To begin with, traffic congestionjam has intensified the level of stress in cities. As the number of vehicles in urban areas has increasedIncreasing the number of vehicles in urban, the level of noise pollution has been increased fundamentally. In this case, in Tehran, the capital city of Iran, the number of private cars has doubled every two years over the last decadeeach two years since last decade, reaching over five million vehicles and leading the citizens to be annoyed more by loud noises created by them. To address this issue, governments should encourage residentsdwellers to use more sustainable forms of transportsafer vehicles, including bicycles, instead of private cars, reducing the bad traffic, especially in the central areas of cities. Another factor is that the level of competition between people has increased considerablyhas considerably been increased. Definitely, to find their desiredfavourable jobs, applicants have to achieve more qualifications and experience than in the pastthan the past. They have to study longer years to achieve the needed certifications to apply and surpass other rivals. For instance, now an electric engineer should be familiar with not only computer software, but with new communication systems; therefore, they have to study longer time at college or university, even nearly four years, to obtain the required certification. As a result, they will have a more stressful life to pass exams or pay tuition feespay tuitions. To solve it, administrations should help inhabitants financially more to be able to pay tuition with less stress, and create more job positions to reducesubside the level of competition between them. In conclusion, traffic and job competition are two leading reasons that have caused individuals to have more challenging in their life. I think state authorities should consider some practical plans which encourage people to use less their private cars and assist them to be able to have less anxiety during their study or searching for jobs.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response is strongest in its clear identification and development of two major sources of stress, with relevant examples and corresponding solutions. Its main limitation is that some proposed measures are not tightly connected to the stated causes, while overloaded sentences and unnatural collocations reduce precision. The highest-priority improvement is to pair each cause with one realistic, directly targeted solution and express that link in shorter, more controlled sentences.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The essay answers both parts of the question by identifying traffic congestion and job competition, then proposing transport and employment or education support measures. Ideas are relevant and extended, although some solutions are only partly realistic or not fully linked to the stated cause.
For each cause, explain the exact stress mechanism and then give one practical solution that directly reduces that source of stress.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response has clear progression from introduction to two main causes and solutions, followed by a conclusion. Cohesion is generally effective, but very long sentences and repeated references to levels weaken control.
Split each body paragraph into cause, example, and solution moves so the reader can follow the reasoning without overloaded sentences.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary range is adequate for the topic, with terms such as traffic congestion, job competition, qualifications, and anxiety. There are several unnatural collocations, such as dwellers, safer vehicles, favourable jobs, and subside the level.
Use common academic collocations such as "urban residents", "public transport", "desired jobs", "tuition fees", and "reduce competition".
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The writer attempts complex structures and meaning is mostly clear. Errors with agreement, articles, word order, comparatives, and noun forms are frequent enough to limit accuracy.
Check subject-verb agreement and word order in every sentence that begins with a long introductory phrase.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
It is said that day-by-day people’s lives are becoming increasingly stressful. What are the reasons behind that? What can be done to solve this problem?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.