Some people believe the aim of university education is to help graduates get better jobs. Others believe there are much wider benefits of university education for both individuals and society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Sample Response
Higher education plays a pivotal role in an individual's professional life. Many people are of the opinion that the role of university education is to merely facilitate a graduate's job hunting endeavours. Others, however, believe that the benefitsbeneficial ramifications a university can provide for its students are many. This essay analyses both points of view. I believe that besides helping graduates find better jobs, a university can do much more.
On the one hand, the primaryprimal objective of any university is to award a successful candidate with a professional degree. Although a degree may not guarantee a job, it is nevertheless necessary, as employers will not hire an individual without the right kind of academic qualifications. So a university degree increases the job prospects of individuals, and this is why people are inclined to believe that this is the only objective a university is supposed to fulfil. For instance, more than 80% of parents in South Asian countries believe that their children should have university degrees for the sake of getting a better job.
On the other hand, many believe that a degree is just one of the many benefits universities can offera university can offer. A university does improve many soft skills of its learners, such as confidence, empathy, delegation, observation, imagination, responsibility, planning, analysis, problem-solving skills and many more - the importance of which for personal, professional and social success are undeniable. These days, many employers seek not only applicants' academic qualifications but also important soft skills. These soft skills help people thrive in their personal liveslife, contribute more effectively to society and the nationcontribute better to society and the nation. Thus university education goes beyond preparing young minds for their careers.
I believe that universities shape young students to become personally, socially and professionally ready to take challenges and contribute more for the betterment of all. Students learn many soft skills that help them not only do better in their jobs but also become better members of society and develop and grow as individuals.
To conclude, it is clear from the above discussion that universities emphasise developing their learners' overall skills, includingskills - including academic, professional and personal skills, that are required for success in life while also becoming better citizens.
Why this response received Band 8.0
The essay presents both views clearly, maintains a consistent opinion, and develops its argument through logical, well-controlled paragraphs and generally accurate, flexible language. Its main limitation is that some support remains broad and a few transitions or lexical choices feel formulaic; the best next step is to add a specific example of wider social benefit and express the conclusion in sharper, more natural academic wording.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response directly discusses both views and gives a clear opinion. Ideas are relevant and well developed, though some support remains general rather than strongly evidenced.
To push higher, add one more concrete example showing how a non-career university benefit helps society, not only individuals.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay is well organised with clear paragraphing and logical progression. Cohesive devices are controlled, although a few transitions are slightly formulaic.
Make the conclusion less formulaic by restating the argument in a sharper way rather than relying on 'it is clear from the above discussion'.
Lexical Resource
Lexical range is strong and flexible, with precise phrases such as 'job prospects', 'soft skills', and 'beneficial ramifications'. Minor issues include a few over-formal or less natural choices.
Keep the sophisticated vocabulary, but prefer natural academic wording over showy phrasing when a simpler term is more exact.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Grammar is accurate across a range of complex structures. Minor punctuation and number agreement issues remain but do not impede communication.
Check agreement in long noun phrases and use punctuation around dashes and clauses consistently.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people believe the aim of university education is to help graduates get better jobs. Others believe there are much wider benefits of university education for both individuals and society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.