Some people warn that the era of the silver screen is coming to an end and that people will eventually lose interest in going to the cinema. Do you agree or disagree with this view?
Sample Response
It is widely accepted that the silver screenthat silver screen is one of the best forms of entertainmentthe best way of entertaining people. While some people argue that the trend of going to the cinema has declinedtrend for going to cinema have decreased nowadays, some people hold the opinionare in the opinion that it is stillthat, still it is of interest to many peoplemany more people who desire mental relaxation through the artsthe mind relaxation through arts. To begin, there is no denying the fact that time constraints aretime constraints encountered is a common issue for people today and theythese people do not have much spare time to spend on movies. Especially, because of the time requiredlap, one will have to spend watching a filmspend on watching cinema may be rather longa bit of long. Due to the busy schedulesbusy life schedules of people, they may not be willing to devotewill not deserve to commit such a long time for entertainment and will opt for shorter forms of entertainmentshort time entertaining activities. On the other hand, just because of this competitive nature of people's lives, they will engage in more activities that help them relaxmore and more mind relaxation activities in order to reduce the stress level and go to the cinema and watch a moviego for a silver screen and watching a movie. Secondly, with the development of technology, people all over the world enjoy latest technological equipment and innovative as well as newly featured home theatre systems lie on the top of the list. With the availability of such new, highly modified systems at homein hand, people tend to stay home and watch movies with their entire family. In this way, people will not have to spend time on travelling as well as they can enjoy more free postures while they are watching the movie in their own home. By opting to watch movies at home instead of going to the cinema, people can also find it flexible to watch it at their convenienceconvenient. Although it is free and flexible to watch a movie at home, the feeling of a change will not be sensed by the mind as it happens while watching a movie in the cinema. Therefore, some people still prefer to experience the change that can have while they are sitting in the cinema with their loved ones. To sum up, it is acceptable that people tend to be away from the silver screen due to numerous circumstances. Yet, I believe, there are some good reasons that the era of the silver screen will not come to an end although there are reductions in the number of people who will go for it and hence disagree with the statement.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response presents a recognizable disagreement and considers both pressures reducing cinema attendance and reasons cinemas may endure. Its strongest feature is the range of relevant ideas, but frequent grammatical and lexical inaccuracies, together with the absence of paragraphing, make the argument awkward and sometimes difficult to follow. Prioritize clear paragraph boundaries and accurate, natural sentence construction so each reason supports the position directly.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses the issue with relevant reasons on both sides and ultimately states disagreement, although the position is not consistently clear.
State the disagreement in the introduction and develop each reason explicitly around why cinema attendance will or will not disappear.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument follows a broadly recognizable sequence, but the single-block presentation and mechanical linking weaken progression and readability.
Divide the response into an introduction, focused body paragraphs, and a conclusion, using fewer formulaic transitions.
Lexical Resource
There is some range in topic vocabulary, but frequent unnatural collocations and inaccurate word choices reduce precision.
Replace expressions such as "mind relaxation," "free postures," and "at their convenient" with natural, context-appropriate wording.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response attempts varied complex structures, but frequent agreement, article, preposition, and sentence-construction errors sometimes strain comprehension.
Build shorter complete clauses first, then check subject-verb agreement and verb patterns before combining ideas into complex sentences.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people warn that the era of the silver screen is coming to an end and that people will eventually lose interest in going to the cinema. Do you agree or disagree with this view?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.