Some people say that computers have made life easier and more convenient. Other people say that computers have made life more complex and stressful. What is your opinion?
Same question Compare all 3 answers See different approaches and band scores for this IELTS task.Sample Response
"The advent of computers has defined a new age in technology and revolution." As rightly said, things have changed from the past and will certainly change in future. One of the biggest credits goes to computers. This simple looking box has unlimited capabilities which are yet to be unfolded and used for. From entertainment to work, computer covers every prospect of human life. Today an average child would want a computer at any cost. From a child to an old man, each has his/her own need to have a computer. Since the advent of these machines, innovation and remodelling have led to the reduction in its size from the occupation of a large hall by a single machine to a machine that stands on a small table or fits in a bag and during all these changes, the processing and speed have never failed to improve. With computers around life has been easier than ever. For an example, numerous calculations can be done in a click; we can socialise with people all over the world, share the latest news, and develop projects ranging from art to complex engineering. From monitoring, diagnosing to operations, health uses the help of the computers. We depend on computers for passing idle time. A person born in this age might not be able to survive without a computer. But even with these advantages and benefits, computers also bring some disadvantages. As all works have started to be saved in soft copy in computers, securing those data has become more difficult. Leakage of confidential information is always at stake. Even through a normal man's eyes, at home misuse of computers and information it holds can cause just but waste of time. Time numerous social sites and applications deviate a human from his daily tasks into the virtual world. Games pull young children into pressing buttons of their controllers and spending hours a day at home instead of enjoying physical games outside. Therefore, it has its pros and cons; all that counts is how we use it.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Clarify technological change Original: defined a new age in technology and revolution Suggested revision: ushered in a new age of technological innovation Why it matters: The revision uses the natural phrase “ushered in” and removes the vague pairing of technology and revolution.
- 2. Refer to quotation clearly Original: As rightly said, Suggested revision: As this statement suggests, Why it matters: The revision links the comment directly to the preceding quotation without an unnamed speaker.
- 3. Add definite article Original: change in future Suggested revision: change in the future Why it matters: The fixed time expression is “in the future.”
- 4. Use natural credit phrase Original: One of the biggest credits goes to computers Suggested revision: Computers deserve much of the credit Why it matters: The revision states the attribution naturally without treating “credit” as a countable achievement.
- 5. Clarify unrealised capabilities Original: capabilities which are yet to be unfolded and used for Suggested revision: capabilities that have yet to be fully explored and used Why it matters: Capabilities are explored or developed rather than unfolded, and the final preposition is unnecessary.
- 6. Correct scope expression Original: computer covers every prospect of human life Suggested revision: computers affect every aspect of human life Why it matters: “Aspect,” not “prospect,” refers to a part of life, and the general subject should be plural.
- 7. Use inclusive plural reference Original: his/her own need Suggested revision: their own reason Why it matters: The singular “they” avoids the awkward slash form, and “reason” fits the purpose for owning a computer.
- 8. Add introductory comma Original: With computers around life Suggested revision: With computers around, life Why it matters: The introductory prepositional phrase should be separated from the main clause by a comma.
- 9. Repair range structure Original: From monitoring, diagnosing to operations Suggested revision: From monitoring and diagnosis to operations Why it matters: The “from ... to ...” structure needs parallel noun forms.
- 10. Use healthcare collocation Original: health uses the help of the computers Suggested revision: healthcare relies on computers Why it matters: “Healthcare relies on” states the relationship naturally and removes unnecessary articles.
- 11. Correct purpose structure Original: for passing idle time Suggested revision: to pass leisure time Why it matters: An infinitive expresses purpose, and “leisure time” is more natural than “idle time” here.
- 12. Use uncountable noun Original: all works Suggested revision: all work Why it matters: “Work” is uncountable when referring generally to stored material.
Suggested Rewrites
- defined a new age in technology and revolution ushered in a new age of technological innovation
- As rightly said, As this statement suggests,
- change in future change in the future
- One of the biggest credits goes to computers Computers deserve much of the credit
- capabilities which are yet to be unfolded and used for capabilities that have yet to be fully explored and used
- computer covers every prospect of human life computers affect every aspect of human life
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response is strongest in its wide range of relevant examples, covering communication, calculation, healthcare, data security, distraction, and children’s inactivity. Its main limitation is that the opinion is only partly consistent, the essay is presented as one long paragraph, and several ideas are listed or expressed awkwardly rather than fully developed. The highest-priority improvement is to state a precise position early and organise two or three strongest reasons into focused paragraphs with clear explanation.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Response
The response discusses both convenience and complexity with relevant examples, but its final position is broad and some points receive limited explanation.
State whether the benefits generally outweigh the stresses and develop the strongest evidence for that judgement rather than listing many uses.
Coherence and Cohesion
There is a broad progression from benefits to drawbacks and a conclusion, but the absence of paragraphing and several abrupt shifts weaken coherence.
Separate the introduction, benefits, drawbacks, and conclusion into distinct paragraphs with one central idea in each.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is adequate and sometimes varied, but recurring inaccurate collocations and word choices reduce naturalness and precision.
Replace expressions such as “covers every prospect,” “health uses the help,” and “leakage is at stake” with standard collocations.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Both simple and complex structures are attempted, but frequent errors in agreement, articles, pronoun reference, and sentence construction reduce accuracy.
Break long sentences into controlled units and check agreement and singular-plural reference before adding complex clauses.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people say that computers have made life easier and more convenient. Other people say that computers have made life more complex and stressful. What is your opinion?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.