Eating sweet foods produces acid in the mouth, which can cause tooth decay. (High acid levels are measured by low pH values) Describe the information below and discuss the implications for dental health.
This response is estimated at Band 5.0. Can you write a better one?
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Sample Response
The chart illustrates changes in pH levels caused by three types ofdescribes the information about food items sweet foods(sweet food) that potentially cause tooth decay as they produce acid in the mouth.in mouth. In the chart, high acid levels are measured by low pH values.
Overall, honey is likely to produce a high amounthigh amount of acid in the mouth, causingacid in mouth, causing significant damage to the teeth in a short time, whereas canecan sugar produces a higher level of acidlower level of acid but sustainssustain the effect.
Honey surpassesoutnumbers all other sweet foods in producing acid in mouth in the first 13 minutesin first 13 minutes causing significant damage to the teeth and the likelihood reduces after approximately 15 minutes. Fruit sugarWhereas fruit sugar creates less acidity in the mouth, butacidity in mouth, but the effect lasts for longercomparatively longer which is approximately 20 minutes. Afterwards, tooth decay is likely reduced.
Why this response received Band 5.0
The response identifies the overall topic and attempts to compare the trends shown in the graph. However, key data points are misreported, such as confusing which substance reaches the highest acidity level, and the text falls well below the recommended length. To improve performance, expand the detailed comparison using exact numerical values from the graph and describe key visual milestones accurately.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The writing outlines the main subject but misinterprets key data trends and omits crucial visual markers such as the critical pH threshold line.
Ensure all key features and specific values, such as the minimum pH levels reached by each substance and the 5.5 danger line, are accurately presented.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information is arranged in separate paragraphs, but cohesive devices are sometimes misused and sentence connections are occasionally incomplete.
Link contrastive statements cleanly without starting fragment sentences with subordinating conjunctions like 'Whereas'.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary control is limited with inappropriate word choices for describing data trends and noticeable errors in word forms.
Use appropriate terminology for continuous data, avoiding words like 'outnumbers' when referring to measurement levels or scale values.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
There is a mix of simple and complex structures, but grammatical errors and incomplete sentence patterns reduce overall accuracy.
Check complex sentence structures to ensure main clauses are grammatically complete and verb tenses remain consistent.