Eating sweet foods produces acid in the mouth, which can cause tooth decay. (High acid levels are measured by low pH values) Describe the information below and discuss the implications for dental health.
Sample Response
The given line graph gives information on the amount of acid produced in our mouth by eating sugar and honey made from three different resources namely fruit, sugarcane and honey. Also, the graph estimates the time taken by them to reach different acid levels which are related to the tooth decay.
The maximum level of acidity produced by sugar content is reached 5 minutes after consuming them reaching up to 3.5 pH for sugarcane, 4 pH for fruit sugar and 5 pH for honey. After this time the acidity level declines for cane and fruit sugar, whereas it is sustained for 10 minutes for honey. Honey takes approximately 15 minutes to reach the pH of 5.5. It is at this pH at which tooth decay is unlikely. Fruit sugar takes 20 minutes and cane sugar takes the maximum time to reach this safety level. After 40 minutes all three sugars reach neutral pH that is 7.
Acidity promotes tooth decay which results in teeth cavities. Proper brushing and mouth washing can eliminate sugar particles and may protect teeth from the hazards of high acid levels.
From the given data it is clear that cane sugar has the highest acidity and its acid content above safety level is sustained for the longest period in our mouth. Therefore it should be avoided. Honey is the safest sugary food which causes least chances of tooth decay.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Name measured variable Original: amount of acid Suggested revision: pH level Why it matters: The graph directly plots pH, with lower values indicating greater acidity.
- 2. Use impersonal reference Original: our Suggested revision: the Why it matters: The mouth is more appropriate than our mouth in an objective report.
- 3. Use correct source term Original: resources Suggested revision: sources Why it matters: Sources is the natural term for the three sweeteners shown.
- 4. Use chart categories Original: namely fruit, sugarcane and honey Suggested revision: namely fruit sugar, cane sugar and honey Why it matters: The graph labels the two sugar categories as fruit sugar and cane sugar.
- 5. Improve sentence linkage Original: Also, the graph Suggested revision: The graph also Why it matters: Moving also after the subject creates smoother formal cohesion.
- 6. Clarify the reference Original: time taken by them Suggested revision: time each sweetener takes Why it matters: Them has an unclear antecedent, while each sweetener identifies the three lines directly.
- 7. Remove wrong article Original: the tooth decay Suggested revision: tooth decay Why it matters: Tooth decay is an uncountable general condition and takes no article here.
- 8. Add introductory comma Original: After this time the Suggested revision: After this time, the Why it matters: A comma should follow the introductory time phrase.
- 9. Clarify stable honey level Original: it is sustained for 10 minutes for honey Suggested revision: honey's acidity remains stable until 10 minutes Why it matters: The revision removes the unclear pronoun and states the time relationship naturally.
- 10. Remove duplicated linker Original: at this pH at which Suggested revision: at this pH that Why it matters: Only one linking construction is needed after pH.
- 11. Use time superlative Original: takes the maximum time Suggested revision: takes the longest Why it matters: Takes the longest is the natural expression for the greatest duration.
- 12. Use value construction Original: neutral pH that is 7 Suggested revision: a neutral pH of 7 Why it matters: A pH of 7 is the standard construction for stating the value.
Suggested Rewrites
- amount of acid pH level
- our the
- resources sources
- namely fruit, sugarcane and honey namely fruit sugar, cane sugar and honey
- Also, the graph The graph also
- time taken by them time each sweetener takes
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response offers a detailed, well-organised interpretation of the curves and draws the important conclusion that cane sugar poses the greatest risk while honey is the safest. Most timings and pH values are accurate, though a few descriptions blur the distinction between acidity and pH, and the brushing advice is unsupported by the visual. Prioritise precise scientific wording and evidence directly traceable to the graph.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response accurately compares the main pH patterns, identifies the safety threshold, and discusses relevant implications for dental health.
State that honey returns to neutral pH by about 25 minutes and avoid adding hygiene claims that are not shown by the graph.
Coherence and Cohesion
Clear paragraphs separate the introduction, graph details, dental implications, and final comparison, with generally logical progression.
Move the key comparison of cane sugar and honey into an earlier overview so the main trend frames the detailed data.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary is sufficiently varied for describing acidity and risk, but several collocations are awkward or scientifically imprecise.
Use 'sources of sugar', 'pH falls', 'risk of tooth decay', and 'causes the lowest risk' for greater precision.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of sentence forms conveys the analysis clearly, although article use, pronoun reference, and some relative clauses are not consistently controlled.
Clarify subjects and references, for example: 'Each substance reaches its lowest pH five minutes after consumption'.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
Eating sweet foods produces acid in the mouth, which can cause tooth decay. (High acid levels are measured by low pH values) Describe the information below and discuss the implications for dental health.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.