The two maps below show an island, before and after the construction of some tourist facilities.
Same question Compare 5 different answers
Sample Response
The two maps illustrate the development of an island in terms of tourist facilities. Overall, it is clearly shown that there are big changes before and after the construction while the surface area of the island remains almost unchanged. First of all, it is apparent that most of the areas of the island are occupied by accommodations which did not exist before the construction. In addition, a reception has been built in the centre of the island which is surrounded by the vehicle track. It is worth mentioning that a restaurant has also been added to the island which is located just behind the reception and they are linked by a vehicle track. Furthermore, a pier was constructed in front of the reception and it was connected by a vehicle track so as to provide some leisure activities to the tourists. Last but not least, the beach located to the west of reception is now opened for the tourist to swim.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use precise wording Original: big Suggested revision: substantial Why it matters: This more formal phrase describes the scale of the development precisely.
- 2. Correct the extent Original: most of the areas of the island Suggested revision: the western and central parts of the island Why it matters: The accommodation occupies the west and centre, while the eastern end remains undeveloped.
- 3. Use uncountable noun Original: accommodations Suggested revision: accommodation Why it matters: Accommodation is normally uncountable when referring collectively to tourist lodging.
- 4. State map direction Original: just behind the reception Suggested revision: directly north of the reception Why it matters: A compass direction describes the restaurant's position more accurately than a relative viewpoint.
- 5. Add the article Original: to the west of reception Suggested revision: to the west of the reception Why it matters: The definite article is required before this previously identified building.
- 6. Use correct adjective Original: opened Suggested revision: open Why it matters: Open, rather than opened, describes the beach's current availability.
- 7. Use plural noun Original: for the tourist Suggested revision: for tourists Why it matters: The plural noun is needed when referring to visitors in general.
- 8. Use neutral linking Original: Last but not least Suggested revision: Finally Why it matters: A neutral transition is more suitable for an objective visual report.
- 9. Reduce wordiness Original: it is clearly shown Suggested revision: it is clear Why it matters: The shorter phrase conveys the same meaning more directly.
- 10. Focus on the change Original: before and after the construction Suggested revision: following construction Why it matters: The comparison concerns how the island changed after the facilities were built.
- 11. Describe shape accurately Original: surface area of the island remains almost unchanged Suggested revision: physical shape of the island remains unchanged Why it matters: The maps show no alteration to the island's outline or area.
- 12. Use descriptive transition Original: First of all Suggested revision: Turning to the details Why it matters: This transition more clearly signals the move from overview to specific map features.
Suggested Rewrites
- big substantial
- most of the areas of the island the western and central parts of the island
- accommodations accommodation
- just behind the reception directly north of the reception
- to the west of reception to the west of the reception
- opened open
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response identifies the main new facilities and follows a generally clear route around the developed island, with appropriate location language. However, the overview is vague, several important features such as the footpaths and preserved eastern area are omitted, and a few descriptions are imprecise. Prioritise a more specific overview and group the changes geographically, then compare what was added with what remained unchanged.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response covers several major additions and includes an overview, but it omits the footpaths and preserved eastern area and describes the overall transformation only vaguely.
State the main spatial pattern of development clearly and include key unchanged features alongside the principal additions.
Coherence and Cohesion
The information progresses logically from accommodation to central facilities, the pier, and the beach, although the single paragraph and formulaic sequencing limit organisation.
Separate the overview from two geographically grouped detail paragraphs and use linking expressions more selectively.
Lexical Resource
The response uses adequate map vocabulary for locations and construction, but imprecise choices such as "big changes" and "opened for the tourist to swim" reduce precision.
Use more exact expressions such as "extensive tourist development" and "the beach was designated for swimming" while avoiding repetitive construction verbs.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures conveys the meaning, but article, number, agreement, and reference errors recur in phrases such as "most of the areas" and "they are linked".
Check noun forms, articles, and pronoun references so that each facility and connecting route is described unambiguously.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The two maps below show an island, before and after the construction of some tourist facilities.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.