All university undergraduate courses should include a period of time spent studying abroad or doing a work placement. Do you think the advantages of this would outweigh the disadvantages?
Sample Response
People have different views about whether all university undergraduate curriculacurriculum should include a period of time for studying abroad or seek a temporary career. In my opinion, while it may negatively affect their formal learning, it is worth havingworth to have a gap year for studying abroad or find a short-term job.
There are two main reasonsreason why it could be arguedargue that undergraduates should always stay on campusundergraduate should always stay in campus. First, undergraduates are also studentsundergraduate are also student, their main mission is to study their major and other essential subjects knowledge which is the foundationfundation of their future careers. If they overlook this knowledgeoverlooked these knowledge, they would find it difficult to secure a suitable jobfind them difficult to gain a suitable job. Secondly, undergraduates commonly lack self-disciplineundergraduate are commonly lack of self-principle, leading them easily led into harmful habitseasily to be introduced harmful habits without a supervisor. For example, many students cannot take control of themselves so that they spend their time outside the school on entertainment, wasting their time in their prime years.on entertaining, wasting their times in the best ages.
However, I would agree with those who believe that undergraduate are supposed to experience studying abroad or a placement periodexperience a studying abroad or temporary career period. It should be the formal university curriculum assigned with professional tutors to assist and supervise students. Undergraduate can develop their independence and abilities to deal with social situations. By living or working in a place they have never been toa venue they've never been, they have to learn how to communicate and cooperate with different kinds of strangers, and studying abroad also improves their language skills.studying abroad also improve their language levels. If studentsstudent first learn these skills when they are in a real company, they will pay a higher price for the lesson.pay more to the leason.
In conclusion, while there are some reasons to believe that undergraduate should spend their time on studying their major,on studying major, my own view is that a studying abroad or working period will substantially benefit their future career plans.will really substantially benefit to their plans of future career.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The essay presents a clear position on the advantages and disadvantages of including study abroad or work experience in university curricula, maintaining a logical structure throughout. However, frequent grammatical and agreement errors along with occasional inaccurate word choices hinder full clarity. The highest-priority focus should be improving grammatical accuracy, particularly subject-verb agreement, noun plurals, and prepositions.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses both sides of the prompt and clearly states a position that the benefits outweigh the drawbacks.
Ensure all supporting points directly explain why the advantages are more significant than the disadvantages rather than drifting into general student behavior.
Coherence and Cohesion
Paragraphing is logical and ideas generally progress clearly from one section to the next using basic linking words.
Use a wider variety of cohesive devices and transitions to connect thoughts more smoothly between sentences.
Lexical Resource
A sufficient range of topic-related vocabulary is used, though word choice errors and awkward collocations appear regularly.
Focus on correct collocations and word forms, such as distinguishing between singular nouns and plural adjectives like 'undergraduate' and 'undergraduates'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex sentence patterns is attempted, but frequent grammatical and punctuation errors occur throughout the text.
Review subject-verb agreement, plural noun forms, and basic passive structures to increase the frequency of error-free sentences.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
All university undergraduate courses should include a period of time spent studying abroad or doing a work placement. Do you think the advantages of this would outweigh the disadvantages?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.