An increased number of people today change their career and living places in their lives. Is it a positive or negative development?
Sample Response
The modern world has seen athe profound growth in availability of various job prospects and better living standards. This trend has enabled people across the globe with a wide range of career options while an improved and more affordable lifestyle has becomeimproved and affordable lifestyle became the key factorkey path breaker in helping them move across the globe. I believe it is a positive developmentmovement.
There are several reasons why people undergo a career change and relocation. Sometimes, lack of job opportunities and the poor financial situation in one's regionpoor financial situation of one's state could be the key factor leading to change in career path. Another reason could be better wages and low tax rates in other states, adding to more savings and an increased happiness in people's livespeoples' lives. In addition to this, better living standards and fast-paced career advancement opportunitiesa fast-paced career advancement opportunities, helping one to climb the ladder of organisational positions even faster, could be some of the main reasons.
Naturally, it is considered to be a positive and an advantageous practice, leading to improvement in one's well-beingones' well-being and better financial possibilities. With the smooth flow of finances, one can invest in other businesses or can better support his family in various ways like for child education, health services, housing, entertainment, travelling etc., therefore, a major contribution to a better lifethe ultimate contributing factor for the better life. Moreover, changing the place of living due to career changes provides one with options to experience the different cultures and traditional customs of many parts of the world.
In conclusion, many people prefer to opt for alternate career options and sometimes a different place to livedifferent place of living for various life and jobs related reasons. This shift is considered rewarding and largely positivea rewarding and absolutely positive for mankind as it comes with a wide array of benefits along with fulfilling lifestyle.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response maintains a clear positive position and supports it with relevant reasons and benefits, giving the essay a purposeful and generally coherent direction. Its main weakness is the limited examination of possible disadvantages, while several long, list-like sentences and awkward forms reduce precision. Add a concise concession about disruption or instability, then organise each paragraph around one developed idea and proofread noun phrases and collocations.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The essay presents a clear positive view and gives several relevant reasons and benefits, but it does not seriously consider possible drawbacks, which limits balance for this development question.
Add a brief concession about instability or family disruption before explaining why the benefits are stronger.
Coherence and Cohesion
The organization is clear, with separate introduction, reasons, benefits, and conclusion, though some sentences are long and progression sometimes becomes list-like.
Use one central idea per paragraph and connect examples more explicitly to the positive-development judgement.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is generally adequate and sometimes varied, but there are awkward collocations and word forms that reduce precision.
Use natural collocations such as career opportunities, standard of living, and job-related reasons.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses a range of structures, but article use, plural possessives, and sentence endings are inconsistent.
Proofread noun phrases carefully, especially articles before singular countable nouns and possessives such as people's.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
An increased number of people today change their career and living places in their lives. Is it a positive or negative development?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.