An increased number of people today change their career and living places in their lives. Is it a positive or negative development?
Sample Response
With more and more technological developmentadvancement, global connections are becoming strongerthe world is becoming smaller day by day. Modern means of transportation and communication have enabled the business organisations become globalbusiness organisations to become global. This has also created opportunities for peopleopened doors for people to travel and live in different places in the world, and even have more options for changing careerscareer change options.
In spite of challenges associated with relocatingmoving places, more and more people are keen to explore and experience living at different places. This not only takes away the boredom associated with living at the same place, or doing the same job for long, it also brings a lot of personal growthgrooming and adaptabilityadaptation ability to one's character. This further improves their ability to grow in their career and seek out the best opportunitiesseek out best opportunities available.
Many people now ask why they should reject a good opportunity simply because it requires relocation."Why say no to a great opportunity just because it needs the change of a place?", is the modern generation's thinking. The Internet and mobile phones have further helped with this cause.
HoweverBut, there are some downsides of this. The traditional way of living at the same place and being in the same profession for many yearsmany-many years provides stability and peace for both mind and body. One can maintainkeep better health by staying at one place. Life will be less stressful. And while adults may like the changes, it could be difficult for childrentaxing for kids to adjust to new environments, and make new friends.
To conclude, there are both good and bad aspects of changing places or careers, but the fact is more and more people are embracing it, and this is becoming part and parcel of modern life. The more flexible people are, the better their career opportunities becomeMore the flexibility for change, better the career opportunities are.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response is clearly organised and considers credible advantages and disadvantages of changing careers and places, so its overall direction is easy to follow. The central limitation is that the conclusion describes the trend without decisively judging whether it is positive or negative, while several ideas and expressions remain broad. State a clear overall verdict and explain why the strongest benefits outweigh the identified costs.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The essay addresses the topic and considers both benefits and drawbacks of changing careers and places. However, the final position is not fully decisive about whether the development is positive or negative, and some points are broad.
State clearly that the development is positive overall, then explain why career opportunity and adaptability outweigh stress and instability.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response is paragraphed clearly and progresses from background to advantages, disadvantages, and conclusion. Some very short paragraphs interrupt development and could be integrated more smoothly.
Combine the quotation-style paragraph with the advantages paragraph, and use clearer topic sentences for the negative side.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is generally adequate for mobility, careers, and modern life. Some collocations are unnatural, including technological advancement, personal grooming, taxing for kids, and part and parcel.
Use precise phrases such as technological development, personal growth, challenging for children, and a common feature of modern life.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Grammar is mostly understandable, with some complex structures. Errors occur in articles, comparatives, word order, and sentence fragments, but they rarely block meaning.
Edit short emphatic sentences and comparative structures so they form complete academic sentences.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
An increased number of people today change their career and living places in their lives. Is it a positive or negative development?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.