There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the International music that is heard everywhere nowadays?
Sample Response
Each country has its own unique music style. For instance, operaOpera and Jazz music are famous in Westernwestern countries and on the other hand, India and Spain are famous for classical music and salsa dancingclassical music style for salsa dancing. Globally, information technologyGlobally information technology has made tremendous progress. Technological advances have producedInformation technology has invented numerous sophisticated devices to play music anywhere, at any timeanywhere anytime. People tend to listen to music depending on their mood. They tend to listen to sad music if they feel down or sad. It has become a popular trend to listen to music while doing yogaYoga or exercisingdoing exercise in the gymnasium. Listening to musicListening music while doing sports activities can boost energy levelslevel and bringbrings a passion for sportthe passion of sports in mind. Music is a kind of daily activityMusic is kind of daily activity nowadays and is considered as the food for the soulfood of souls according to many people. Furthermore, some students play music while solving math equations. According to students, math is the only subject thatmath is only the subject which can be studied while playing music. On the other hand, for example in the huge shopping centres, the background music is played 24/7. Because people love shopping and walking in the malls. However, the traditional music of any country is very important and plays a vital role. For instance, traditional music expresses that what we belong to and what is our culture. A country is judged by its heritage and traditional music. If a country is rich inof traditional music then it is possible that it can be popular around the world. But nowadays, young children are addicted to listening to international musiclistening international music. They are not even aware of their culture and traditional music. The new generation is followingNew generation is following the Western music style. It is the responsibility of parents to give them the knowledge of their traditional music. In the conclusion, actually, everyone has a perception of listening to his/her favourite music. But in most countries, people avoid taking interest in traditional music. Therefore, most of the countries are losing the value of their culture and traditional music. At last, the main responsibility of parents is to aware children to listen and introduce traditional music to the world.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response offers numerous relevant reasons for listening to music and clearly values traditional music as a carrier of cultural identity. Its effectiveness is limited by shallow comparison with international music, a single unbroken paragraph, repetition, and frequent language errors. Prioritise a clear two-part structure with separate developed answers, then support the claimed greater importance of traditional music through direct comparison rather than repeated assertions.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses both questions and expresses a preference for traditional music, but supporting ideas are uneven and the comparison is underdeveloped.
Explain directly why preserving cultural identity outweighs the benefits of international music, using one focused comparison.
Coherence and Cohesion
There is a recognisable movement from the uses of music to traditional music, but the single paragraph, abrupt shifts, and mechanical linking weaken progression.
Organise the response into an introduction, one paragraph for why music is needed, one comparative paragraph, and a concise conclusion.
Lexical Resource
The response has sufficient topic vocabulary to convey its views, but repetition and frequent inaccurate collocations reduce precision.
Learn natural patterns such as 'listen to music,' 'rich in musical traditions,' and 'make children aware of their heritage.'
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The writer attempts varied sentence forms, but frequent errors in agreement, articles, prepositions, and sentence boundaries reduce control.
Edit each sentence for subject-verb agreement and complete clause structure, avoiding fragments beginning with 'Because.'
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IELTS Writing Task 2
There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the International music that is heard everywhere nowadays?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.