There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the International music that is heard everywhere nowadays?
Sample Response
Music is the language of the world and it presents the unique traditions and customstradition and custom of a tribe, society or nation. People listen to different types of music with great interests because it inspires us, refreshes our mind, heals our wounds, motivates us and so on. However, it is debatable whetherarguable that whether the traditional music of a nation plays a more crucial rolemore crucial roles than the modern music that is popular worldwide. From my point of view, the formerformer one is more important than the latterlatter one becausefor the reason that it can reflect the cultural identity and the history of a nation.
First of all, no one can deny that most peoplemost of the people love to listen to music as it inspires us, relaxes our mind and letslet us forget our anxiety and tension. For example, a person may get stressed out and tired when he returns from the office and the music can work like magicwork as the magic to remove his tiredness. A growing number of people these days listen to music while commuting and this is quite effective to enjoy the time even on a busy road and amidamid of a tiringtiresome journey. Rich lyrics can enhance our intellectual level and it is often true that a person could be judged by the types of music he listens to. Music is a global language that connects people, protests injusticeunjust, inspires people and creates a unique form of entertainment which is not only refreshing but also educational.
Traditional music itselfTraditional music, itself, represents traditions and customs of a nation. Behind the music, there is a nation's history and storythere are history, story of a nation and even religious lessons. In addition, traditional music can connect people with their cultural heritage, inheritedleft from ancestors. Hence, it plays athe vital role and preservesbears the indigenous practices and dignity of a nation. Thus, we must preserve our own traditional music as it can tellthey could tell the history and life of our ancestors as well as what we really are. Despite that, many people choosechose to listen to the international music. It can bring different nations together and teach lessons that were unknown to a person. The music is different and can suitsuite with a person's choice.
In conclusion, traditional music is much more important than the modern international music which can be heard in every part of the world. Youngsters should give their heart to their own traditional music to keep their cultural heritage alive.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response’s strongest feature is its complete and clearly signposted answer: it explains several purposes of music and maintains a consistent preference for traditional music. Its main limitation is language control, as frequent article, agreement, preposition, and collocation problems make otherwise varied expression sound unnatural. The highest priority is to proofread complex sentences for grammatical accuracy and replace imprecise combinations with natural academic phrasing.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both questions are answered directly, with a clear position and relevant, substantially developed reasons.
Deepen the comparison by explaining more precisely why traditional music’s cultural value outweighs the benefits of international music.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically through a clear introduction, two focused body paragraphs, and a consistent conclusion.
Use cohesive phrases more selectively and strengthen reference chains so pronouns always point clearly to the intended noun.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied and often topic-specific, but recurrent collocation, spelling, and word-form errors reduce precision.
Check less familiar phrases in context and replace combinations such as amid of and suite with with idiomatic alternatives.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response attempts varied complex structures, but frequent errors with articles, agreement, prepositions, and clause construction remain noticeable.
Prioritise accurate control of articles and subject-verb agreement before adding further complexity to sentences.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the International music that is heard everywhere nowadays?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.