The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.
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Sample Response
The diagram explains the way in which rain-shadow desertsthe rain-shadow deserts are created. Overall, there are seven stages in the process, beginning with the winds getting closer to the coasts and culminating in already transformed dry winds reaching inland areas.
The formation of the desertdessert begins with the winds approaching the coast of the seasidesee side, which are then pushed upwardswhich after are pushed up towards the mountain peakstop of the mountains, passing the windwardWindward side. It is then followed by the process of moist air risingmoist rising and cooling.
Following this,Furthermore, cooled air is transformed into clouds. The next stepNext step is the rainfall, which is the direct result of cloud formationcreation. Subsequently, the dry air continues to descend the mountaindrop down the mountain, passing the leeward side.
In the subsequent stage, these dry windsalready dried winds are finally able to reach the inland area. During this process, the winds travel thousands of kilometers before they get inlandbefore it gets inland and finishes the overallprofound process of rain-shadow desertdeserts formation.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The essay successfully describes the key stages of the rain-shadow desert formation in a logical, step-by-step manner with a clear overview. However, its main limitations are minor vocabulary errors and occasional grammatical inaccuracies in complex sentence structures. To improve, focus on refining word choice and correcting sentence construction errors to enhance overall precision.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response includes a clear overview and reports all main numbered steps shown in the process diagram.
Ensure all added details are strictly supported by the visual, avoiding misinterpretations of scale annotations.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information is logically organized in sequential order using a variety of basic transition words.
Use more varied cohesive devices to link process steps smoothly without relying on repetitive sequencing phrases.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary covers the necessary technical labels from the diagram, though spelling and word form errors occur.
Review spelling accuracy for core vocabulary and ensure proper noun and word-class choices throughout the description.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex sentence structures is attempted, though minor grammatical and pronoun agreement errors are present.
Practice maintaining subject-verb and pronoun agreement when combining clauses in relative sentence structures.