The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.
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Sample Response
The diagram illustratesdelineates the formation of a rain-shadow desert.
Overall, there are seven stages in total, commencing with winds approaching the coast and culminating in the formation of a desert. This process can be categorizedre-categorized into three main phasesthree major groups, namely the movement of winds carrying moisture from the sea, precipitation, and the final formation of a desert.
The whole process extends thousands of kilometres from the coast to the rain-shadow desert.
Initially, when the winds approach the coast and encounter the mountains, they are pushed upwards along the windward side. Next, as moist air rises and cools, dense clouds form before rain falls near the mountain peakbefore precipitation occurs over the mountain peaks.
In the subsequent stages,Turning to the subsequent stages, after releasing its moisture on the windward side,because of precipitation on the windward side, dry air continues over the mountain and descends along the leeward side. Eventually, when the dry winds reach inland areas, a rain-shadow desert is formed due to a lack of precipitation.
Why this response received Band 8.0
The strongest aspect of this response is its clear logical organization and precise presentation of all seven stages shown in the diagram. Vocabulary and grammar are both controlled with high accuracy and natural academic phrasing. To improve further, integrate the scale detail seamlessly into the body paragraphs rather than placing it in a single isolated sentence.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response presents a clear, comprehensive overview and accurately covers every step of the process illustrated in the diagram.
Ensure single key details, such as spatial scale, are connected naturally into the description of the stages rather than stated in isolation.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information is logically sequenced throughout, utilizing appropriate cohesive devices to signpost each stage clearly.
Combine short, single-sentence paragraphs into main body sections to improve overall structural flow.
Lexical Resource
A good range of accurate geographic and process vocabulary is used appropriately throughout the response.
Incorporate even more varied sentence openings and process verbs to avoid repeating similar transitional phrases.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide variety of complex sentence structures is produced with consistently high grammatical accuracy.
Maintain this strong standard by experimenting with passive and active participle clauses to vary sentence rhythm.