You recently took a part-time job working for a local company. After a few weeks, you realised there were some problems with the job. Write a letter to the manager of the company. In your letter: - explain why you took the job - describe the problems that you experienced - suggest what could be done about them
Sample Response
Dear Mr Patrick, I have been working as a part-time computer operatorI am working as a part-time computer operator in your office for the last six weeks. I took the job to fund my internship in a software programming course. Today, I am writing to raise some concerns about the problems I am facingthe problems I facing on the job and hoping for your helphoping your intercession to solve them. I was told at the time of joining that the working hours would be from 2:00 pm to 6:00 pmfrom 2:00 to 6:00 pm. However, I have been working from 2:00 to 10:00 pm for the last couple of days. Unfortunately, the person who is supposed to come at 7:30 pm sharp does not show up until 10:00 pmuntil 10.00 pm. Moreover, my supervisor requiresforces me to work on Fridays, which, according to my job contract,which according to my job contract is not mandatory. Although I managedAlthough I had managed to work on Friday until last weekuntil the last week by missing a few lectures at college, this will be unmanageableit seems unmanageable in the future as this will affect my studies. I would really appreciate it if you could talk to our supervisor about these problems and help me find a solutionoffer me a solution as early as possible. Otherwise, I would have to quit the job, even though I enjoy my work and love working for your company. I look forward to hearing from you soon.Looking forward to hearing from you soon.
Yours sincerely, Riya Nagpal
Why this response received Band 7.5
The letter addresses every part of the task directly, explaining the reason for taking the job, detailing both scheduling problems, and making a clear request for help in a logical sequence. Its main weakness is uneven language control, including overformal word choice and awkward verb patterns; the best next step is to state specific remedies for each problem and proofread the request for natural workplace phrasing, tense, and punctuation.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The letter clearly explains why the job was taken, describes the extended-hours and Friday-work problems, and asks for managerial help.
Keep the relevant content, then revise the wording and organisation points highlighted in the essay comments.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response is logically ordered and already has useful paragraphing, though the final request could connect more explicitly to the two problems.
Use clearer paragraphing and smoother links so each bullet point is easy to follow.
Lexical Resource
Workplace vocabulary is adequate, but some choices are unnatural or too formal, especially “intercession”.
Prefer natural collocations and precise topic vocabulary over overformal or translated-sounding phrases.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of structures is used, but verb patterns, tense and punctuation need polishing.
Proofread tense, articles, prepositions and sentence boundaries before submitting.
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You recently took a part-time job working for a local company. After a few weeks, you realised there were some problems with the job. Write a letter to the manager of the company. In your letter:
- explain why you took the job
- describe the problems that you experienced
- suggest what could be done about them
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.