When choosing a job, the salary is the most important consideration. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
We cannot deny that we work to earn money so that we can put food on the table for the family. However, we also look for job satisfaction, growth opportunitiesopportunity and social recognition infrom our careers and salary alone cannot make us happyonly salary can not make us happy in our professional liveslife. I, therefore, believe that salary is not the most important aspect when choosing a job.
To begincommence with, salary is important because without money we will perhaps not get a job. Some people consistently prioritise incomeare always after money and do not hesitate to change jobschange their job if they are offered a higher salary. However, forto others, job satisfaction is equally important or sometimes even more importantis equally, or even sometimes more important because it can support work-life balanceas it ensures work-life balance. Many people would not compromise their job satisfaction for the salary offeredfor the money they are offered. Many top executives, who resign from large corporations in order to work for smaller companies or run their own companies, are cleargreat examples of how much they value job satisfaction over the wages they earn.
Moreover, Career growth is"growth opportunities" is another aspect people often expect in their careers and it can become even more important than the initial wage they are offered. A moderate salary and a great career growth aspect are far better than a higher salary and no career growth - according to many professionals, and they are prudent enough to envision the future than to run after only money. Finally, people often want to be in a career that is socially respectedsocially appreciated and valued. For example, a few of my colleagues left high-paying private-sector jobshigh-paid private jobs to take government jobs because those roles would give themonly because that would give them social recognition, and I fullyquite understand the rationale for their decisions. For them, status and power are more important than the money they earn.
In conclusion, job satisfaction which ensures a work-life balance is often more important than the income we earn from our jobsmoney we get from our job. Moreover, career growth and social recognition often drive us to choose a job that brings us less money than we could otherwise make from other high-paying jobs.
Important aspects of a job other than "salary":
1. Job security 2. Job satisfaction 3. Great working environment 4. Opportunities for the use of skills and abilities 5. Appreciation and rewards 6. Feeling safe at the workplace 7. Social recognition 8. Passion for the work 9. Contributing to the betterment of the environment and people 10. Benefits and compensation 11. Respect and trust 12. Great co-workers and management 13. Retirement benefits 14. Good work-life balance 15. Learning and career development 16. Company's financial stability
Why this response received Band 7.0
The essay presents a clear disagreement and develops job satisfaction, career growth, and social recognition with relevant explanations and examples. Its principal weakness is the unintegrated sixteen-item list placed after the conclusion, which disrupts the finished argument and introduces undeveloped material. The highest-priority improvement is to delete that list and refine a few awkward comparisons within the otherwise coherent essay.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The position is clear and well supported by three developed considerations, but the appended list adds numerous undeveloped points after the argument has concluded.
Remove the post-conclusion list and use the available space to deepen one existing example or acknowledge why salary may still matter.
Coherence and Cohesion
The main essay is logically sequenced and well paragraphed, while the raw numbered list after the conclusion significantly disrupts overall progression.
End with the conclusion and ensure every supporting point is integrated into a developed body paragraph rather than attached as notes.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a flexible range of work-related vocabulary, with occasional awkward collocations and comparative phrasing.
Refine expressions such as 'career growth aspect', 'socially appreciated', and 'envision the future than to run after only money'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex structures is generally accurate and meaning remains clear, despite a few agreement and comparison errors.
Check singular-plural agreement and comparative forms, especially 'growth opportunities are' and 'rather than pursue money alone'.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
When choosing a job, the salary is the most important consideration. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.