Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such things as food and education? Or is it the responsibility of the governments of poorer nations to look after their citizen themselves?
Sample Response
Nowadays, a lot of disasters are occurring in different countriesdisasters are coming to different countries such as earthquakes, floods, and typhoonslike earthquake, flood and typhoon. These disasters are some of the reasons why other countries are having difficulties in daily lifetrouble with their life. Because of these disasters, manyBecause of these a lot of buildings, industriesbuilding industries, farms, schools and houses are destroyed that can lead to the shortage of resourcesshortness of the resources of one nation. Trauma can also beTrauma also can be an additional factor that weakens countriesfactor to down countries. Besides, some countries lack technological developmentlack the technological development, natural resources and skilled manpower which are required to improvedevelop the overall condition of a country. Thus, the question arises whetherThus the question arises, whether the rich nations should extend a helping hand toraise their helping hands to those poor nations or the governmentsgovernment of those poor nations should take the initiative to changetake initiative to change the fate of the nations. In order to support developing countrieslift up the underdeveloped countries, some type of help is needed. Besides, other nations are lucky to are in more favourable positionshave better positions that are not prone to disaster and also rich in natural resources. In addition, some of these nations have invented high technology gadgets which play as a business wherein they get their funds for some projects of a country. Therefore, in my opinion, the fortunate nations should aid poorer nationsaid to the poorer nations according to their willingness, status and laws. Although helping others are very warm feeling, it should be watched out for. It should be taken care of also to avoid dependency and abuse that can lead to war and discrimination of different cultures. In summary, the one who has a better status in life or in government must render concern to others with limitations in order to teach also independence and bring back the confidence of an underdeveloped country.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response presents a recognisable position that richer countries should offer conditional assistance and raises the relevant risk of dependency. Its main limitation is incomplete task development: extensive background on disasters replaces a direct comparison of wealthy-country aid with poorer governments' own responsibility, and frequent language errors reduce precision. The highest priority is to build one developed case for each side before reaching a clear, qualified judgement.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A relevant qualified view is given, but the alternative responsibility of poorer governments is only briefly acknowledged and supporting ideas remain general.
Explain what wealthy nations should provide, what poorer governments must do themselves, and why a limited partnership is preferable.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response moves from causes of need to aid and dependency, but one-block presentation, lengthy background, and loose connections weaken progression.
Use separate paragraphs for the need for external assistance, domestic responsibility, and the final balanced position.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary conveys the broad argument, but frequent unnatural word choices and collocations substantially limit precision.
Use natural phrases such as suffer disasters, shortages of resources, support poorer nations, provide aid, and prevent dependency.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Both simple and complex forms are attempted, but frequent agreement, article, clause, and noun-form errors weaken control while meaning remains generally clear.
Prioritise complete clause structures and agreement, especially disasters occur, buildings are destroyed, helping others is, and nations should provide aid.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such things as food and education? Or is it the responsibility of the governments of poorer nations to look after their citizen themselves?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.