The chart below shows the amount of leisure time enjoyed by men and women of different employment status.
Sample Response
The bar graph illustrates the amount of time that was spent on leisure activities per week by males and femalesby male and female from various employment statuses during the 1998-1999 periodbetween 1998 to 1999 period. It is clear thatclear that that unemployed and retired menman and women had the most leisure time of all the groupshighest leisure time among the other groups. Total time spent on leisure activities by the unemployed and retired male and female groups were the highest among the other groups. The time spent byTimes spent by the unemployed and retired men were approximately 85 and 84 hours per week, while the figures for women were the samewhile the women's were the same at around 79 hours. As for the full-time employed men and womenfull time employed male and female, their weekly figures were approximatelywere accounted at an average of 45 and 38 hours, respectively45 and 38 hours respectively. The chart shows thatIt is noticed that in the part-time employed group, no figure was provided for menthe amount of leisure time for the men was zero, while the women spent around 40 hours per week. FinallyAnd lastly, the amountnumber of leisure time that was spent by housewives per weekon a weekly basis was approximatelywas accounted at approximately 50 hours.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response identifies the highest-leisure groups and reports most displayed figures accurately, including the male-female differences among full-time workers, unemployed people, and retirees. Its main limitation is treating the absence of a male part-time bar as zero, alongside repetitive wording and frequent grammatical errors. The priority is to distinguish missing data from a zero value and organise the comparisons by employment group without repeating the overview.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The overview and most category values are accurate, but the report incorrectly interprets missing male part-time data as zero.
State that no male figures are shown for part-time employment or housework and compare only categories where both sexes are displayed.
Coherence and Cohesion
The categories follow a generally logical order, but the overview is immediately repeated and the entire response remains one paragraph.
Use a separate overview and group unemployed and retired people together before comparing the remaining employment categories.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary is adequate for hours and employment groups, but repeated phrases and inaccurate collocations limit flexibility and precision.
Use expressions such as 'had approximately 85 hours of leisure', 'the corresponding female figure', and 'no figure is provided'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Meaning remains clear, but frequent errors in agreement, articles, noun forms, and prepositions occur across the response.
Check plural agreement and countability in phrases such as 'men and women had', 'the amount of leisure time', and 'between 1998 and 1999'.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The chart below shows the amount of leisure time enjoyed by men and women of different employment status.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.