The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.
Sample Response
The line graph compares the proportions of the population living in citiesproportions of the city population across four Asian countries (the Philippines, Malaysia, Thailand, and Indonesia)(Philippines, Malaysia, Thailand and Indonesia) in the years 1970 to 2020, together with predicted percentages for 2030 and 2040.
It is noticeable that all four countries experienced an overall growth in population in the period, despite fluctuationsfuctuations for the Philippines.for Philippines. Moreover, the figures for all four countries are predicted to grow from 2030 to 2040, with Malaysiawith the Malaysia staying top of the list and Thailand at the bottom.
In 1970, the urban population rate in the Philippines ranked highestcity population rate of Philippines ranked top of the list, at around 32%, followed by Malaysia with a share of 30%. The figuresfigure for Thailand and Indonesia were much lower, at around 18% and 14% respectively. In the following two decades, the figures for all four countries grew steadily and showed changes in rankings by 1990remained the same relative order in 1990, while Malaysia overtook the Philippineswhile Malaysia overtook Philippines in 1980 for a short periodperid.
Between 1990 and 2030, both Malaysia and Indonesia saw a rapid rise in the proportion of urban residentsproportion of city population (rising from about 45% in 1990 to roughly 81% in 2030 for Malaysiarising from about 45% to roughly 82% for Malaysia and from around 24% to approximately 58% for Indonesia). Meanwhile, the share for the Philippines experiencedshare for Philippines experienced a decline from about 48% in 1990 to 43% in 2010, before steadily climbing to 50% in 2030, while Thailand's figure remained plateaued at around 32% between 1990 and 2020 before reaching roughly 40% in 2030.Thailand stayed relatively still in the first ten years before increasing to slightly above 40%. According to the prediction, all four countries will see a steady growth from 2030 to 2040, with Malaysia projected to peak at over 80% and Indonesia reaching about 64%.from 2030 to 2040, with Malaysia still having the highest city population rate.
Why this response received Band 7.5
The response effectively highlights key trends, comparative data, and precise figures with a well-structured layout. A slight inaccuracy appears in the overview where 'population' is mentioned rather than the percentage living in cities, alongside minor mechanical errors. To improve, ensure conceptual terms precisely match what the chart measures and eliminate minor typos.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The main trends and figures are accurately described, supported by a clear overview identifying general growth and highest/lowest projections.
Ensure overview phrasing explicitly specifies urban population percentages rather than general population growth.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information is logically grouped into chronological periods with smooth transitions between comparative trends.
Maintain the strong paragraph organisation while ensuring transitions between complex data points remain fully natural.
Lexical Resource
A good variety of trend and comparative vocabulary is used naturally throughout the response.
Proofread carefully to fix occasional spelling slips such as 'fuctuations' and 'perid'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A good mix of complex sentence structures is produced with generally good control over grammar.
Pay attention to subject-verb agreement and article usage, such as changing 'the figure ... were' to 'was' and removing redundant articles.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.
Your response
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