The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.
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Sample Response
The line graph describes data about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities between 1970 and 2040.countries between 1970 and 2040.
Overall, the percentage of the population living in cities in all four Asian countries increases, both historically and in future projections.countries increase and not only in the past but also in future. Specifically, the figure for Malaysiathis data in Malaysia sees the most significant growth. In contrast, those in Thailand and Indonesia rise steadily.
The percentage of the population living in cities in Malaysia is projected to increase markedlygoes up markedly from 30% to approximately 80% from 1970 to 2040. Then, a significant increase can be seen in the percentage of the population living in cities in Indonesialiving in Indonesia in cities and it from the lowest position to second highest from about 15% to 60% over the entire period.at the same time.
The proportion in the Philippines rose moderately between 1970 and 1980,There was a fluctuation in this percentage in the Philippines from 1970 to 1980, after which it substantially jumped from roughly 34% to nearly 50%roughly 32% to over 50% and then it slowly dropped from 1990 to 2010, before ascending significantly and the line graph predictspredict it will reach around 50% in 2040. Regarding the remaining country,Finally, the percentage of the urban population in Thailandpopulation in Thailand in cities increased gently but noticeably from roughly 18% to over 30% by 202019% to just over 30% and the graph predicts that it will rise sharply to around 50% by 2040.and then graph predict there will see a steep increase in this data in the future.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The report effectively highlights key trends and comparisons across all four countries with a clear overall summary. However, grammatical inaccuracies and fractured sentence structures occasionally hinder clarity and the smooth presentation of data. To improve, focus on mastering complex sentence grammar and eliminating awkward structural errors like missing verbs or redundant clauses.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The main trends and key figures are identified and described across all four nations with an effective overall summary.
Ensure all reported data points accurately reflect the visual chart details without misreading figures.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information is logically grouped into separate paragraphs following a clear structure, though some transitions are slightly awkward.
Refine referencing pronouns and sentence connectors to maintain smooth flow between complex data comparisons.
Lexical Resource
A good variety of vocabulary for describing trends and changes is used across the response.
Focus on precise word combinations and avoid repetitive phrases like using data as a subject inappropriately.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of clause structures is attempted, but frequent grammatical errors and incomplete sentences affect sentence control.
Practice constructing accurate compound-complex sentences with correct subject-verb agreement and verb forms.